My journey started with changing how I viewed myself and this wasn't necessarily easy. A lot of stuff goes into how we view ourselves and I'll admit the words of other people affected how I looked at myself. I had to push that aside. I couldn't let what others said get into my head and live there. Sometimes our own voice is overlooked in our desire to be accepted but our thoughts of ourselves need to be the most important ones.
You have to say to yourself I am worth the time and effort it's going to take to feel better. I am worth the investment, because frankly, you are. Call it whatever you want, self care, taking back your life, whatever, just remember that you are indeed worth all the time and effort it takes. And when you are down and depressed, which can happen from time to time. Say to yourself, I know I'm worth the 5 minutes to read about my medication. I know I am worth a few moments to read about how I can eat a little better. I know I am worth it and I have a right to it.
This isn't about some catchy phrase that you say to yourself in the mirror. Although if that helps, then I wholeheartedly support you. This is about a belief that you need to have. It can be really difficult dealing with an autoimmune disease on top of everyday life. It can get really depressing and you can end up feeling like you can't handle the battle, that you're not up to it. That you're not in control and the disease is dictating your life. That you have been robbed of the life you once had. I spent a lot of time feeling like this, accepting what RA told me what I could not do. I finally came to realize that I wasn't living. I was longing. Longing not to be tired, longing not to feel pain, longing for the things I used to do, Longing to feel human again. I couldn't go on like that and after years of longing, I decided it was time to figure out how to live better with RA.
And this is what I'm talking about here. I had to start believing that I was worthy of my own time. I was worthy of my own effort. That I had a right to those things and had a right to take care of me. That for an hour or so everything and everyone else could wait, while I worked a little on me to get better. So I could feel better, more awake, less brain fog, more present in my day. So that I could feel more in control.
Take the time to read the pamphlet that comes with your medication. Take the time to find a healthy snack. Take the time to stretch your limbs in the morning. Take a moment to appreciate that you are up and tackling your day despite this disease. Celebrate it. Because some days just getting the day is all we can do.
You are worthy of your time. You are worthy of the effort. You have a right to feel better and you have a right to your own time. Take it and be there for yourself. You are worth it.
Comments